Tag Archives: food

Burger and Chips from McDonald’s, Chiswick

After such an amazing experience with my own home made burgers, I thought I’d give the Chiswick High Street ago and seek out the ultimate defender of the burger.

They stopped counting once they had sold their billionth burger, they had countless re-designs of their stores and re-bradnings. They’ve never had a good review in their life and were under public scrutiny since 1982 – of course I’m talking about the one and only Mc Donald’s.

The Big Tasty... apparently with bacon
The Big Tasty... apparently with bacon

I’ve seen this particular candidate on their menu before, called The Big Tasty.

Inevitably, I associate this burger with the taste of human flesh… there’s something about the special sauce that reminds me of when the German cannibalism trial was on (remember? Bloke answers an ad and wants to be eaten, then eats parts of himself with the other guy? Not funny!) – think that’s when the Big Tasty came to Britain.

First things first:

I ordered the one with bacon. It said “with bacon” on the box, and that’s certainly what I’ve paid my £5.29 for (that’s with soggy fries and a flat diet coke). Bacon would seriously have made a difference here – but it was not to be. 27 thumbs down for that to start the review.

Next up:

the burger itself. Bigger than the bun, fried well (at Micky Dee’s, they’re not grilled you know). There’s something about that beef taste though… I’m sure it’s not 100% as the advert claims.

Is this the same product?

We also find some “special sauce” on this thing, a slice of tomato, some lettuce, cheese (preformed) and onions. It’s all like the advert describes, it just does’t look like it.

When I ordered the “large meal”, I didn’t recall being asked if I wanted some chips with my salt either! I did find some though: soggy, not sweaty, and with that typical Mc Donald’s fat taste once they cool down. You know, the one that sticks to your gums long after the meal is over.

This burger combo gets some plus points in regards to price though:

for the same amount of food, you sually have to shill out a lot more money. And when you do, you don’t get a headache later that day, like in this example (now we know what we pay extra for). My overall wellbeing after eating this was… well… not amazing.

Sure I survived, and I’ve lived on an almost exclusive Mc Donald’s diet many moons ago – but it looks like over the years my body has developed senses for what’s good and what isn’t. This clearly isn’t!

Do you see any damn bacon on this thing?
Do you see any damn bacon on this thing?

In conclusion:

This monster of a huge burger isn’t for the faint hearted. In fact, it’s for NOBODY. Do youself a favour and order the nuggets instead.

Verdict: 47 Thumbs Down!



If you like to try your own hand at running The Fast Food Business and experience the difficulties first hand, why not try the amazing McVideo Game at http://www.mcvideogame.com/ (not endorsed by McDonald’s btw)

Burger and Chips at The Green Court – featuring my own burger recipe

Home made burgers... 47 Thumbs Up!
Home made burgers... 47 Thumbs Up!

It was time for me to roll up my sleeves and see if I still had it in me. Why put everybody else to the test, when I can do these things myself?

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for MY OWN homemade burgers!

Here’s the secret recipe:

  • Take the leanest steak mince you can find, say from Sainsbury’s. Have 500g (one pound) or a tad more.
  • I recommend steak mince over ordinairy beef mince, especially over “half pork, half beef”, and that’s not because I’m scared of Swine Flue. Anything other than steak mince. The reason is that other minces will leak, and on the grill, smoke up the joint.
  • Make sure you actually USE THE MINCE before it turns into some gray gunk stinking up your fridge
  • Get some cos or iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, onions if you like
  • Make sure you USE THIS TOO before it turns into green slime – I’ve seen it all
  • Get some large soft fresh baps, preferrably with sesame on the top. Kingsmill do good ones, or instore bakeries at supermarkets. Stay away from the sort that’s been on your Off License’s shelf for the last decade, with a best before date next year. You’ve been warned!
  • Treat yourself to a packet of Knorr or Maggi “Fertige Gewürtzmischung für Gehacktes” – although you have to import that from Germany. My Mum was kind enough to send a few packets over; alternatively, use Coleman’s or Schwartz – mix it with the mince as per instructions on the pack

Alternatively, you can make your own mixture, like in the good old days. Therefore, have the following ingredients ready:

  • one egg
  • a handful of breadcrumbs
  • salt, pepper, chilli, paprika, curry – that sort of thing
  • if you’re a herb lover, go for oregano, thyme, majoram
  • mix everything together with the mince, using a fork or your bare hands

Now it’s time to shape the burgers. You do this best with warm hands. Take a good scoop and first make it into a ball, then flattening it evenly. Make sure no bits fall off, can easily happen if you’re using onions in your mixture.

You want to check that the burger is about the size of your buns. If you decide to go ahead with anything other than steak mince, you will have to account for shrinkage too. Pork, lamb or “half and half” cheap-o-sucker stuff can shrink by up to 50% – seriously!

Fresh from the grill
Fresh from the grill

For best results, grill your burgers for 15-20 minutes, turning them every 5-6 minutes. Use common sense here and don’t turn them over if they’re completely rare of course. On electric grills, do this at 180-200 C or gas mark 5 (god only knows what that is in Fahrenheit).

If you want them raw (which you shouldn’t have), use a higher temperature to brown the outsides, and cook them shorter. You’re taking the risk of serious unwellness.

If you cook your burgers too long (either because you’re paranoid, or just forgetful), you’re running the risk of a dry burger. That’s not nice, because you have to drown it in ketchup and mayo. You want them juice, but well done.

OK, time to eat:

use your imagination to decorate your plate, slap on all the condiments you can find in the fridge, grab a beer and enjoy! Serve them with chips, or open a packet of Kettle Chips like I do (stay away from Pringles if you can).

Share your delight below, or even send a picture to burgers@versluis.com!

Burger and Chips at The Vintry, St. Albans

On a spontaneous trip to meet Al Monty and JB, we checked out this very wine based gastropub in the centre of Verulamium, or better known as St. Albans.

Burger and Chips at The Vintry, St. Albans
Burger and Chips at The Vintry, St. Albans

A decent burger, with plenty of oompf. They do the 8oz and 10oz version, with various toppings and in various styles. Bacon, Emmental Cheese, baby tomatoes, anything you could think of. This place could have been a burger bar in a different life.

I opted for the 10oz version, which comes with chips, and is only £6.90 – which is a bargain compared to London prices. You get this with a pint of coke for under a tenner, which gives extra plus points right from the start.

As for condiments you have Heinz squeezable mayonnaise (which was empty), mustard and Heinz ketchup from a glass bottle. But you also get a side dish of their famous “Bloody Mary Ketchup” in a little pot on the plate, which is great – a hint of Tabasco and a bit of something else make this one an unexpected dunkable delicacy.

The burger itself is huge. Definitely the size of a DVD, with a grilled sesame bun. Mine was a bit burned, but the waiter exchanged it immediately for a nicer one. Full of meaty goodness I say, this home made burger stands out. Well done yet juicy, served with a huge slice of tomato and two slices of lean bacon. Bit of lettuce, and that was it.

The chips were special too: thing cut, like fries rather than thick cut, with the skin on in places. These babies are not off the shelf and remind me of what you get at The Outback Steakhouse (but different… you get my drift).

Verdict: it was so big that I couldn’t finish it. That’s a GOOD sign. It was juicy, it was tasy – it was the best! Up there in Burger Heaven, not even The Diner can touch it!

11 Thumbs Up!

Chicken Burger and Chips from Deliverance

Having received a raving review on the Beef Burger, I decided to give Deliverance another go.

Judging by the photo, "terrible" is an understatement
Judging by the photo, "terrible" is an understatement

However, on the Chicken Burger, they couldn’t quite “deliver”.

With the usual sweaty chips and all the ingredients you would expect from a good burger, this one came to the office luke warm. On top of all that, the top of the granary bun was rock solid hard.

Not good, especially when we know they can do better. Considering £8.50 plus £2.50 chips, we’re all very disappointed… In their defence, I must admit having had this dish before, and it was definitely on to another winner.

Bad luck in the kitchen, I guess you just can’t win the all.

Verdict: grab a Pot Noodle